Hmm~~

Wonder why.. i can't control my tears nowadays they just fall.. and i only realize i was crying until the tears drop on my hand.. seeing the rain now.. don't know how to feel.. wanting to cry.. but i can't cry.. don't want to cry.. don't even feel like crying.. the tear drop... why.. too sad inside? my heart.. it feel painful and itchy and the same time.. staring at the rain and wonder what i said last time about everyone's emotion.. just now seeing a funeral and all that i thought i forgot just came back to me.. so clearly.. too clear.. till.. i am sorry for what i did.. i miss you.. i miss you a lot.. really.. today in chinese calendar is yours and mine birthday.. i really really miss you a lot.. i want.. i want to see you again.. to hug you like before.. don't really remember about that.. but through picture you taken of me.. i can only imagine.. but i don't remember much.. only some.. but those some.. are the ones i regret doing.. or regret not doing.. i'm sorry.. really really sorry.. forgive me.. :(