Either or.. neither nor??

Clear my mind...  hmm.. how?? i don't know why everytime i empty my mind.. i feel scare.. i just feel like someone is behind me.. or maybe there is... is just i am never calm to feel it.. now clearing my mind is kind of a scary thing.. but i have to.. in order to learn.. to learn something.. and so i can understand why.. i guess it is normal being afraid.. but i have to overcome it either way.. if not.. i can't learn.. and i know it's scary.. but what to do i want to learn... @@